BREAKUP IN THE TIME OF QUARANTINE

They say, “ accepting the other person as truly as they are , is essential for any two people sharing a bond”. But does that mean rigidity in habits that doesn’t help you or in the worst case , harm you. Is a push too extreme an act ?

Reading relationship literature and hearing from ‘educated’ people say “you never have to push a person or partner to change and have to go great lengths to accept their flaws and even tune into their best/ worst time mindsets” ; have stirred up a debate in me. Never have I ever given it an emphasis until now. All that is said acknowledging that everybody is different and have every right to be themselves.

Does telling her not to place unwashed produce on the chopping board and use the same board to cut the washed produce count as push ?

Does telling her, who has major anxiety and sleep quality issues to limit caffeine intake and not take in any caffeine late in the evening count as push?

Does asking her to cook one day in a week, usually on her day-off count as push?

Does asking her to give a helping hand in cleaning the house, once a month, even on a 70/30 split count as push ?

Asking her not to buy produce even before finishing the previous purchase which is wilting in the fridge because its not being eaten. does that count as push?

Does aiming to help her achieve financial independence by making her not buy things that only add to the clutter , count as a push ?

Does asking her who struggle daily with memory, concentration and serious sleep issues to adhere to a good routine to benefit , reduce intermittent social media time and reducing screen time in the night , is it too much ?
When she expresses her desire to care for animals, get married, have kids, ambitious career changes, etc. and she does nothing at the same time frets over it and needs comforting if matters turn sour. Is it too much to say a few things , however badly expressed as the result of cascaded frustrating moments ?

Can he come to terms with the end of the relationship, over her reason of incompatible relationship dragged on for some time ?. It doesn’t deserve to be judged as right, wrong or put up as scoreboard. But doesn’t it have to be contemplated at some point to self reflect or help us grow in some dimension ?.

Have I learned anything ? I don’t know. I come to some conclusion ? I have not. I’m just ready to move on with that heavy heart.